Wait a tick

I am trying hard not to think about the fact that it appears that Obama just killed the unionized American car industry, or at least let it die. Trying very hard. I must say, however, that it is disheartening to read this:

President Obama announced Monday that struggling automotive giants General Motors and Chrysler will be given a "limited" period of time to "restructure in a way that would justify an investment of additional taxpayer dollars."

at the same time that I know that the government is spending $970 billion to buy up worthless mortgages in the hope that one day, maybe thirty years from now, they might be worth something (and then we can auction them off for pennies on the dollar!).

The US autoworker is about to take a giant kick in the metaphorical balls. What makes me cry is that, while I just read a whole lot about how bad Joe Finance has it because he might lose his million dollar bonus at AIG, I imagine I am about to read a whole lot about how Joe Autoworker had it coming because he wanted health care after he retired. Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

I'd also like to note for the record, before we get too far down the fuck road that Obama defended the AIG bonuses because there were in a legal contract, and here he is saying that UAW must again "restructure" its contract in order for the industry to get more bailout money.

Of course, when one looks across the aisle, what do we see? Fuck stick and Lex hero Senator Bob Corker. Here is a guy who looks at a situation where the auto industry is coming to the government begging for money to stay afloat and the government says, sure we'll give you the money, as long as you make some changes to your business (especially if you can figure out a way to fuck your workers, because worker fucking is fun for everyone) and this asshat sees the heavy boot of communism come crashing down on American capital.

Sen. Bob Corker, R-Tennessee and member of the Senate Banking Committee, said this is a "major power grab" by the Obama administration.

"This is a marked departure from the past, truly breathtaking, and should send a chill through all Americans who believe in free enterprise. I worry that in one fell swoop we've lost our moral high ground throughout the global community as it relates to chastising other countries that use strong arm tactics to invade on private property rights," he said in a statement.

God bless the people of Tennessee, but do they really look at the situation with the US auto industry, and one imagines the firing of Rick Wagoner, and see a totalitarian government interfering with the fine, fine businessmen at GM? How can they vote for this guy?

Lord the hate feels good, now I know how Vader felt.

But back to the sadness. Is there anyone who reads this blog thinking Obama is doing well? Are we still cutting him slack? Anyone ready to cut the line? I'm getting very, very close and having a harder and harder time believing that it would have been all that much worse under McCain. Especially when I read shit like this.

Goddammit, I so wanted to have something to believe in.

Dear (very specific) Marxist Academic

I'm not writing this because I disagree with the worldview which informs how you see our current situation and what led to it. I'm cut from the same coarse fiber, and yes, I too see systemic and structural failures wherever I look. That's not the issue.

I'm writing because you are an unmitigated, diseased, treacherous, flamingly poor excuse for an asshole. Calling you a straight-up asshole would actually be paying you a compliment, as assholes do serve a vital purpose. You, on the other hand, are a boil to be lanced.

I see you writing that you opposed the recently passed economic stimulus package, not because it didn't go far enough in providing the help that is so desperately needed, but because it delays the revolution you so desperately desire, possibly because you maintain the childish fantasy that then the masses will recognize your genius and rally around like some latter-day Che.

They won't.

Fuck you.

Fuck you for sitting around and taking a paycheck and an education paid for by the taxpayers you'd see fucked over to exacerbate the "crisis" which you seem to think portends your glorious revolution.

Fuck you for looking down your nose and saying "fuck you" to the people who produce the surplus which allows you to pretend you have all the answers, if only the people would listen.

But most importantly, fuck you for sitting around and doing nothing. Fuck you for not organizing. Fuck you for alienating all your students with your holier than thou bullshit attitude. Fuck you for thinking that your paper about how fucked up shit is is actually a solution. Fuck you for pretending to care about the people for whom you profess to speak, but really, inside you're a hollow, misanthropic piece of shit who'd rather say "I told you so" than do the hard work, make the hard choices, and experience the hard landings from failure that are actually necessary to make this world a better place.

Fuck. You.

Bill Ayers, Chris Matthews, Hardball

i am really interested to see what you people think of this little word-prance between these two dandies.

one thing, and then, by all means go ahead and watch the thing and tell me what you think. just one thing:

1. Couldn't Bill A. have slapped on a collared shirt for the big national television interview? Or is it somehow integrally important to him and his vibe that he appear to be "keeping it real.?" (Of course after the interview the pundits got all snobby about Bill's demeanor and I quickly sprung to his defense.)
   

Hillary Never Would Have Done This

In case you all missed it, Obama gave teachers the ol' "Fuck you" yesterday calling for more charter schools, merit-based pay, and making it easier to fire teachers who "aren't up to the job."

Obviously, Obama is pandering to the "independents" who, along with a great many Americans, have bought into the idea that by the very act of giving birth (or completing adoption papers), a person automatically acquires the knowledge to know when a teacher or school is "good" or "bad." Coupled with this intuitive skill is the fact that God conveniently correlates a teacher's crappiness with the performance of little Johnny or Sally in the classroom. When Johnny gets bad grades or does poorly on a test or (and you know I am just joking here) gets sent to the principal's office, a parent is able to know that this is a crappy teacher in action.

Obama's actions are stupid, stupid, stupid. He just threw teachers and teacher's unions under the bus. The Democratic Party now supports merit pay. Oh, I know that he will try to weasel when he's talking directly to the NEA and AFT. He'll try to say that "merit pay" can be based on any number of criteria. He'll try to say it doesn't necessarily have anything to do with testing. "Charter schools" could mean any number of things. "Vouchers" can mean any number of things. The important thing is we "reach out" and move into a "post-partisan" education policy.

Somehow Barack Obama thinks that the collective bargaining rights teachers in America should be modified or curbed or abridged or taken away so that it is "easier" to fire a "bad" teacher. Which is, of course, the subtext here. Obama needs to show that he's independent of those evil, evil teacher's unions who are dragging down education in this country with their insistence on quality at all schools. Their recognition that which kids from what background end up in their classes is not up to them, so paying them based on how these kids do on standardized tests is ludicrous. These crazy teacher's unions that believe that if employers want to fire their workers, there should be a written process as to how that gets done and that process needs to be negotiated.

The Democratic Party candidate for President just bought a whole host of right-wing talking points. And for what? Do you think that the Republicans are now going to stop attack the Democrats as being in the pocket of the teacher's unions? Does Obama think that joining with the Republicans in demonizing teacher's unions will mean that the Republicans will stop demonizing teachers? Does anything in Obama's experience lead him to believe that the Republicans will accept his proposals as fair compromises between two positions? That they will meet him in the middle?

Of course they won't. The goal of the Republican party is to smash public education in the US. Education is the great equalizer. The Republican party does not want equality. Hell, I think that's their official motto. They are not going to suddenly abandon that goal. They are not going to reach across the aisle.

The conversation in about education in America just took a giant leap to the right. Thanks to Barack Obama, who stood up to his allies instead of his enemies.

Sequoia On My Mind

I was driving behind an SUV (Toyota Sequoia to be exact) full of kids on my way home from the store. It was sporting a bumper sticker that looked like this:




My response?

Fuck. You.

How many thousands of children had to die in Iraq so you could keep driving your death machine? Many thousands of children have had to die to get you to the top of the economic pyramid so you can have your eight kids, your 6000 sq ft. house, your air conditioning, your vacations? How many thousands of children are exploited each day so you can wear your designer fashions, your shoes, your everything that exists in your world? I can't imagine you shed too many fucking tears for them now do you. So Fuck. Fucking. You.

And on my way to the store I was behind an SUV (Jeep) sporting McCain and Smith bumper stickers. I came up with this:

Be yourself!

Seeing as how at least 60% of the OG bloggers and an indeterminate number of our readers find themselves as some part of the "older women and the younger men who love them" duality, I'm sure you will all be pleased to know that our (apparently growing) demographic has been targeted by the relationship anxiety industry for the next iteration of their stale relationship advice.

Speaking for the fellas, I'm sure it never occurred to us that maybe older women would appreciate our attentiveness and good personal hygiene.

Beware: Run-on Sentences, Cursing, and Ill-formed Thoughs Below

Bush is not an economist, he's an optimist. Great. He thinks the economy is on a solid footing. It's only psychologically that people are worried. This is fine. We don't expect our presidents to be economic experts. We expect them to hire guys who know this shit. Then we hope that they listen to these men. No such luck, apparently.

While we're here, several men have taken pains lately to assure me that speculation has little to no role to play in the recent increase in the cost of oil. I'm not going to link, as you've either read it or you haven't, and I've got a couple bay breezes in me ('cause I'm a girl) and I don't want to look that shit up. But the President has told me just today that if we agree to let oil companies "explore" the shit out of the deep continental shelf and the Alaskan wilderness, then people will be assured and the price of oil will come down. In other words, the oil futures market would come down and we would pay less at the pump oil company revenues would drop slightly.

Also, the President also thinks that it's hilarious to not know how much gas costs. Fuck me. And the magic wand. How's this for a magic wand...any gas station that charges more than $3 for a gallon of gas will pay 120% tax on all income derived from charging more than $3. I bet that would bring the price of gas down right quick. Oh, I know, Exxon would only make $7 billion next year instead of $40 billion. Bet they'd stop selling gas altogether, only making $7 billion and all.

If said it before, I'll say it again, fuck me.

Woodstock My Ass

My lovely wife and I went to see the Hancock last night. I have to take her to all the Will Smith summer blockbusters, as she's made it clear to me that she loves the Fresh Prince more than me. Taking her to see the movies is my way of showing that I'm cool with that.

Anyway, Hancock was a fine film. You should go see it. Seriously, I'll wait.

Back? Okay, there was one thing that bothered me about the film [insert clip from the movie Clue of Martin Mull saying, "One thing!?" Classic.] Jason Bateman's character, as you know, just having watched the film, is a bleeding heart liberal and so is his smoking hot wife, whom he managed to score despite having a young kid and no visible source of income, but that's not what bothers me, as I, too, have a smoking hot wife whom I landed while working at Taco Time. So what bothered me is the Woodstock poster they have on their bedroom wall. I know this is hard for people over the age of fifty to understand, but those of us in our mid-thirties who have hearts that bleed for the suffering in the world, do not look to the 1960s for inspiration. Well, maybe a little, but we do not hang framed Woodstock posters in our bedrooms. There would have been hundreds of other ways for set decorator Rosemary Brandenburg to emphasize the fundamental nature of these characters without resorting to Woodstock. Woodstock was the defining event of the previous generation.

Alright, let's get our Independence Day freak on!

Oh, How I love Them All

Message Two. Monday. 6:30 pm: Hi, my name is Dickhead McFuckinstein and I came by the office earlier to make my health insurance payment, but apparently the staff had some other place to be or had better things to do and couldn't take my payment. Well, I understand that today is the deadline, but I can't come back by today, so I'll need to be able to drop that payment off tomorrow. If you can call me and let me know when you'll be in the office so I can make this payment, I'd appreciate it. You can call me at 346-JERK.