Best. Rick Roll. EVER.

Sequoia On My Mind

I was driving behind an SUV (Toyota Sequoia to be exact) full of kids on my way home from the store. It was sporting a bumper sticker that looked like this:




My response?

Fuck. You.

How many thousands of children had to die in Iraq so you could keep driving your death machine? Many thousands of children have had to die to get you to the top of the economic pyramid so you can have your eight kids, your 6000 sq ft. house, your air conditioning, your vacations? How many thousands of children are exploited each day so you can wear your designer fashions, your shoes, your everything that exists in your world? I can't imagine you shed too many fucking tears for them now do you. So Fuck. Fucking. You.

And on my way to the store I was behind an SUV (Jeep) sporting McCain and Smith bumper stickers. I came up with this:

Made with Real Frut

I was eating at Taco Bell today because I hate myself. The tables were festooned with placards adverting their new drink the "Frutista Freeze." I spent my lunch wondering why the fine folks at Taco Bell were thinking with the spelling there. My guess is that 'Mericans think that fruit is spelled "frut" and calling the drink a Fruitista Freeze befuddled them. I also spent some time wondering how this drink name is pronounced. Maybe the name is just an in-joke for Bellers who have a larf at the rubes who don't call it a Frut-rhymes with slut-ista.

I Do Not Think That Word Means What You Think It Means

In an effort to counter-balance the liberal media, some far-right websites run auto-correct on AP articles to change the words "Democratic Party" to "Democrat Party," which is hilarious. Zing!

The American Family Association’s OneNewsNow has taken it a step further by replacing the word "gay" with "homosexual." Speculation could abound as to why they make this change, but I like to believe they are trying to "recapture" the word so that we bloggers will once again have a way to describe weekend outings in the park with our family.

Unfortunately, this is simple transfer of words does not always work out as intended. The readers of AFA's news feed were informed this weekend that American track athlete Tyson Homosexual has breezed to an easy finish in the 100 meters semi-final at the Olympic Trials. Also noted in the headlines were the facts that "Homosexual runs wind-aided 9.68 seconds to make Olympics" and "Close call: Homosexual barely averts major flop in 100."

From now on, the OG will automatically replace all references to "homosexual" with "homersexual."

h/t: Balloon Juice and RWW

What frightens them most

Their Zombie Jeezus is no match...

I have to admit, I'm getting an education in the veritable rainbow of American racism this election season. Here's three of those wonderful colors that I've identified:

• Your old school "they're less than human" crowd
• The "it's actually a privilege to be black in the USA!" gang
• And the "Amerikkka: The Blackening" bedwetters

What colors of the racist rainbow have you grasped?

A Larf For You

Goalies. *sigh*