Finally, Someone Stands Up for the White Guys

More mailbag from the R-G:

Councilor Ralston stands tall

I don’t know about the rest of the folks around the Eugene-Springfield area, but I find it very refreshing that a city councilor can speak his mind and stand by his words even as criticism comes from all sides. Generally, when a story of this nature is reported (Register-Guard, April 23), the first thing a public official will do is to grovel and go on a apology tour.

I support David Ralston, and my respect for him and his position grows the more I see the attacks coming from those who disagree with his stand on illegal aliens. It is nice to see a man willing to stand tall for his principles even as the opposition grows. I will stand proudly with Dave Ralston.

D.W. Northey

Walton

Those of you not blessed to live in the 541 any longer might be wondering what brave stand [Springfield City] Councilor Ralston took that engenders such admiration and man-love from recent Oregon immigrant D.W. Northey. Well, Ralston came out against government funding for Centro Latino Americano, an organization that helps people who speak primarily Spanish access services, because they only cater to "100% illegal immigrants."

You can probably imagine the rest of Ralston's arguments about "invasion," "assimilation," and "dumping their kids in our schools." You can watch here if you'd like, because this asshole is proud enough of himself that he's perfectly happy to be filmed saying stupid shit.

My favorite bit - hell, everybody's favorite bit - is the part where he asserts that he knows that anyone who speaks Spanish is an illegal immigrant because the government would never let someone legally immigrate to the US unless they spoke English.

But D.W. Northey is right. It is surely brave of a white government official to justify voting to cut services to poor brown people on racist grounds. You just don't see it much any more.

Now, if only someone would stand up to the fucking Californians who move here without understanding our culture or values, drive up our housing costs, dump their kids in our schools, and clog up our prisons, that would be truly brave.

Merry Xmas, it's a distasteful collaboration

Okay, so Dave already beat me to name-checking the Onion's very funny list of obscene, absurd albs ("least essentials") from 2008. But I'm left with a question from the otherwise-semi-all-knowing women and men in the a/v control room: how in the motherfudge did Willie Nelson and Wynton Marsalis' Two Men with the Blues get omitted?

Listen. I am not wet behind the ears when it comes to the business of Willie albs. I know this guy'll pretty much roll tape with whoever the bleep can put together a few thousand clams and a session band [ed. note - wait, it's a live collection! live from the ever-bluesy Lincoln Center, baby!]. But nonetheless... this is the sort of thing that deserves at least some perfunctory remarks from the peanut gallery, non? Did everybody else decide just to bow their heads and zip their lips about it while I was out getting a Sun Drop?

See, here's an example of the New Me I was talking about previously. Old Me would say, "who knows what the future holds?" But New Me is not afraid to see the future, to know the future. There are three things I know for sure about 2009:

1. This alb cannot not be terrible, but will enjoy strong sales in Lane County, OR .
   
2. I will have to hear it at some point(s). I will eventually seek it out. In particular I will eventually need to know what "My Bucket's Got a Hole in It" sounds like avec trumpet (blues trumpet!)
   
3. Only the recession conditions will keep me from buying it for our friend Robes. (That and the fact that I still feel kinda bad about a live Bobby McFerrin slab I bought for him. If yr ever over at Robes' house, please ask him to play said slab for you.)

Oh, and if the prospects for this alb excite you, be sure to check out the Amazon customer reviews (here.) Hell, I think I'll chuck a few choice quotations in the damned comments section. It's Christmas, you know? Blues Christmas.

Let's talk about restructuring for a moment, shall we?

To the Senators from the Deep South who decided that clinging to a dying ideology was more important than thousands of middle class jobs:

I couldn't help but notice that many of your home states receive much more federal revenue than you pay in taxes. Hardly the model of self-sufficient, pull yourself up by your bootstraps-tuitiveness, eh? Yet somehow you manage to pony up massive subsidies in order to lure automotive manufacturers from overseas into your states. In other words, the hippy-dippy West Coast, New York, Illinois, Massachusetts, and yes, Michigan - the very people you just completely fucked over - are making it possible for your state governments to give massive handouts to automotive companies (some based in "socialist," big gummint countries with free shriek! health care) that are directly competing with the domestic industry.

Let's say we withhold highway dollars, medicare funds, and social security payments until your states "restructure" those sweetheart deals. What's that? That will hurt people whose jobs and livelihoods depend on the flow of those federal dollars? That didn't seem to keep you from fucking anyone over, now did it?

Britain

Picture this on a crappy t-shirt. Maybe a ringer tee.

I'd wear one.

American Exceptionalism

I was checking online to see if the cheap cat food that I purchased for the 2 strays outside the new homestead had been recalled, and I came across this example of public policy excellence:


Notice that they never mention that they do not have statutory/regulatory authority to recall any product(for pets or humans). They also can not force companies to change any procedures.
No steps before the pets mysteriously become "ill"
Can France boast a bureaucratic response to rival this?

Never could find out if the cheap food had been recalled...