Sat 5: Guilty viewing edition

When you're alone, you know there are DVD's you pop in that you don't necessarily want others to know how much you love. Share your favorite guilty viewing pleasures.

1. Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan - Yes, I'm a Star Trek geek. Yes, this movie is teh awesome. KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!
2. Jackass - Both of them. I suppose there's something timeless about the comedic tradition of getting kicked in the nuts and other pratfalls. I'm eagerly awaiting Jackass III.
3. Half Baked - I still enjoy a stoner comedy, and one starring Dave Chappelle and featuring some awesome cameos (Willie Nelson! Jon Stewart!) really floats my boat.
4. Zoolander - Ben Stiller's finest role, or something.
5. Popeye - I actually know the words to many of the songs in this flick.

Embarrass yourself below.

Sat5 - existential edition

Quoth Sartre, "L'enfer, c'est les autres." And who am I to argue with that? Hell is indeed other people. Cherished reader, your five personal hell-on-earth situations:

1. A three day reggae festival.
2. Being lectured by a 20-something Trotskyite on how to be politically effective.
3. Watching your co-worker's not-very-good Heart cover band at a biker bar.
4. 5th Period - Chemistry - Mr. Bilbrey.
5. Being stuck in line for anything behind a high school tour group.

Sat 5 - Gourmet Edition

Such a great institution, this (intermittent) Saturday survey.

Today's topic: filthy foods. What're five treats you eat that you hope to never be overseen snarfing on, either for aesthetic, dietary, or other arbitrary reasons?

Moi, you ask? Here goes:

5) Cheez-Its: I cannot seem to lay off these partially-hydrogenated squares, tho you won't see me bringing 'em to the nearest faculty potluck. En particulier lemme recommend the Tabasco version.

4) Jalapeno Poppers: These are ideally to be eaten in tiny doses, among friends and as part of a balanced appetizer sampler, non? Well I've been known to trip into Eugene's sports bars during off-hours and semi-formally take down a whole order w/ knife and fork.

3) Vegetarian Jerky/Vegetarian Ramen: both (pale imitations) are unhealthy and thrice the price of their meat-based (or meat-underwritten, as it were) foils. Further proof that we ovo-lactos are wannabe carnivores, and also that we're high-brow wankers!

2) Everything Morningstar Farms: I am a real "fake meat and potatoes" kind of Irish-Catholic shit, and thus avail myself of the Farms' products as part of my risky life-routine. When I make the Buffalo Wings, par example, it's always with a chaser set to the tune of Frank's Red Hot and butter. No wonder I look like a mound of balloons when swimsuit season rolls around!

1) Frank's Red Hot (solo): Ask any roomate! When it's my time to make dinner, I'll twice or thrice or a coupla dozen times pour a half-dollop of Frank's into my palm and lick it up. No nutrients involved, just "taste," and the pleasure that comes into a built-in cycle of lick, pain, guilt.

Sábado cinquo

We're entering the home stretch of the 2008 election, so I thought it appropriate we cast our eye back on the last few months years of the primary contest and enumerate our five favorite also-rans - and by favorite I mean the ones we loved-to-love and, more significantly, we loved-to-hate. Here's mine:

5. Mittens - Mostly I miss the hair, but honestly, he was a punching bag par excellence.
4. Mike Gravel - A cranky old man with a sense of humor and the most surreal pr campaign evuh!
3. Huck! - A cuter, cuddlier conservative. The man jammed out the bass to 70's arena rawk tunes and almost made me believe he actually cared for people.
2. Ron Paul - The Ron Paul Blimp was absolute gold. And here's to the Paultards wreaking further havoc on this election.
1. Dennis Kucinich - Nuff said.

Sound off down below.

Saturday 5

Surely we all have more refined tastes now, but given our collective experiences, we've all had our bouts with bad beer. Bad in the sense that drinking more does nothing to improve their taste. Here's my list, descending from "excruciatingly awful" to "piss in a can":

5. Natural Light - The preferred beverage of my college years, just thinking about this beer is enough to induce a hangover.
4. Fat Tire - Brewed with the all important dirty sock to finish.
3. Lucky Lager - They sold this beer when I was in college for $6/case. I think that it was overpriced.
2. Cool Colt - If I wanted my malt liquor to be minty, I would've filtered my Colt 45 through a pack of Kools.
1. Edison Light - May as well pour this crap directly into the toilet and eliminate the middleman.

Saturday 5

It's been awhile since we've done one of these, so let's have a little fun. Top five albums in your collection that are guilty pleasures. You know, the albums that you love that you would never, ever want the rest of us catch you listening to.

• FutureSex/LoveSounds - Justin Timberlake: Nuff said.
• Judgment Night - Soundtrack: This is the unholy lovechild of "120 Minutes" and "Yo! MTV Raps". The tracks on this album miss more than hit, but damn is it fun. The Mudhoney/Sir Mix-a-Lot collaboration "Freakmomma" is worth the price.
• Up - REM: The lads minus Bill Berry start life anew as an art pop trio. They fail, sounding more like warmed-over Automatic for the People. Fortunately for me, I still like Automatic.
• In Through The Out Door - Led Zeppelin: The last studio Zep album definitely does not rock, but I still love it.
• Flash Gordon Soundtrack - Queen: C'mon, tell me you don't love, "Flash! Ah aaaaaah!"

You may point and laugh in comments, so long as we can point and laugh at you.

Saturday five

Per our conversation from yesterday, name five things unions can do to improve public confidence in Organized Labor. I'm looking at this as essentially a PR question, rather than "what can we do to improve the labor movement," although there's obviously some overlap. On top of that, some unions already do some or all of the things I'm going to mention - you can think of this then as a sort of (forgive me) "best practices" type question.

1. Transparency, transparency, transparency - People should know how unions arrive at the decisions they do, and members should know how to access the decision-making process
2. Invest in member leadership development - When people think "union," they should think of their co-workers, neighbors, and family members instead of an international president or paid staff person (not that those other two aren't important). People have more confidence in people who are close to them
3. Push community involvement - while bread and butter issues will always have a central role in the life of a union, they should also find ways to become involved in their communities beyond just collective bargaining
4. Stop selling out workers - This is directed primarily at Andy Stern
5. Manage inter-union conflicts better - This one's kind of vague. I'm not suggesting a quieter or less vigorous politics within and between organizations, or shying away from competitive campaigns. But at the point where squabbles overtake the welfare of the workers we organize, we should have a strong cup of calm-the-fuck-down

All right, kids! Add yours and rip apart mine in the comments!

Saturday five

My query to you: name five bands that changed your life.

To be clear, I'm setting the bar pretty high with "changed your life." I want you to name bands that if you hadn't discovered them when you did, it's entirely conceivable that you would not be the person you are today. Here's mine (in order of discovery):

1. the Beatles
2. REM
3. the Minutemen
4. the Flaming Lips
5. Phish

Leave yours in the comments.