tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2171294815895801587.post7464201568131867658..comments2023-10-22T13:06:32.952-04:00Comments on Organizing Grievances: Crap/Not Crap: Flaking outwobbliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13840385151170176977noreply@blogger.comBlogger9125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2171294815895801587.post-34661541326613017012008-09-22T19:02:00.000-04:002008-09-22T19:02:00.000-04:00i've flaked on two different weddings (after RSVP-...i've flaked on two different weddings (after RSVP-ing.) <BR/><BR/>honestly, i've done worse things, but that's the kind of fuck-up that keeps me awake late at nite. <BR/><BR/>it's hard to be a good person, but relatively easy to NOT be a BAD person, y'know? so when i eff up that way, it sticks around in my noggin. Never Again, I say.lex dexterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02984338384931444324noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2171294815895801587.post-20076145962350672292008-09-22T15:31:00.000-04:002008-09-22T15:31:00.000-04:00Re-reading my rant in a sober frame of mind, I wan...Re-reading my rant in a sober frame of mind, I wanted to add this. We all flake from time to time in ways big and small - myself included.<BR/><BR/>There's a hierarchy of flaking, as well. Flaking out on after-work beers is forgivable in my book. Flaking out on personally important events and/or events that require some degree of coordination is crap.<BR/><BR/>But the biggest thing that chaps my hide is the enabling. When I've flaked out on something big, I've been yelled at, and it never occurred to me to think, "Why is that person so pissed off? What a dick!" My flaking out was wrong, and I accepted the scorn heaped upon me. But I've also had the shoe on the other foot where I was pissed at a person for flaking and <I>I</I> was the dick for not cutting the flaker some slack.<BR/><BR/>People flake - just own up to it when you do.wobbliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13840385151170176977noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2171294815895801587.post-5971864230177788902008-09-22T15:10:00.000-04:002008-09-22T15:10:00.000-04:00hey, that last comment reminds me: i had four flak...hey, that last comment reminds me: i had four flakers (3 RSVP'd yes then didn't show; 1 never acknowledged invitation) for my wedding...and we only invited 30 people!<BR/><BR/>let me upgrade my previous response to flaking = really crappy crap!ashhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13427741354514319653noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2171294815895801587.post-6213550450341103582008-09-22T14:56:00.000-04:002008-09-22T14:56:00.000-04:00definite crap, buuuutttt, some psychoanalysis is d...definite crap, buuuutttt, some psychoanalysis is deserved. <BR/>I have encountered flakers all over the world. I had a total of 15 flakers for my wedding- i.e. RSVP'd that they'd come and then didn't. This was in the ever-polite South. That's much worse than not RSVPing at all, mind you, which is a different type of flaking.<BR/>When a few were confronted about it, they said that something came up and they didn't want to disappoint me. <BR/>Didn't want to communicate with me openly and honestly is more like it. <BR/>You see, in all my dealings with flakers, it comes down to human beings not knowing how to communicate honestly and effectively. When I lived in South America, it was almost expected to flake rather than to say "no" to anything. They didn't want to disappoint you or openly have to deny any situation. People would say that they were going to do something knowing full well they weren't going to do it. <BR/>It seems rather crazy, but I'm guilty of it too. Why can't we just tell the twoof?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2171294815895801587.post-32864254108306798592008-09-22T11:29:00.000-04:002008-09-22T11:29:00.000-04:00flaking = crap (which, by extension, often means a...flaking = crap (which, by extension, often means ash = crap)ashhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13427741354514319653noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2171294815895801587.post-43732048018577197582008-09-22T10:57:00.000-04:002008-09-22T10:57:00.000-04:00Flaking: crap.Wobs' response: not crap.Flaking: crap.<BR/>Wobs' response: not crap.mike3550https://www.blogger.com/profile/09621465191508532187noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2171294815895801587.post-35080042718927274542008-09-22T10:47:00.000-04:002008-09-22T10:47:00.000-04:00Crap. I am punctual. I meet my commitments. You...Crap. I am punctual. I meet my commitments. <BR/><BR/>You see, Wobs, society is a social contract, wherein the potential frictions of living in collectivizing cities while maintain individualized identities are lubricated through the judicious use of what we call "manners." <BR/><BR/>As you know, I could go on, but it always ends in me singing "Rule Britannia" and I don't sing too good in comment sections.dave3544https://www.blogger.com/profile/05683213316867939951noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2171294815895801587.post-14618875835966224922008-09-22T10:33:00.000-04:002008-09-22T10:33:00.000-04:00This definitely isn't aimed at you or anyone else ...This definitely isn't aimed at you or anyone else on this blog. Someone flaked on me last night, and I was a little pissed (in both the "been drinking" and "angry" senses of the word).<BR/><BR/>So there's no need to apologize. But you must weigh in with a crap or not crap.wobbliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13840385151170176977noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2171294815895801587.post-44496824761577688772008-09-22T09:57:00.000-04:002008-09-22T09:57:00.000-04:00I feel as if I should apologize.I feel as if I should apologize.dave3544https://www.blogger.com/profile/05683213316867939951noreply@blogger.com